UGG-ly

"Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months." - Oscar Wilde

He should be writing this one.

I've noticed a fashion trend that, unlike others that go off a cliff to die, has made a comeback. A 'comeback' means said trend had gone into remission, the perfect term to use since the similarities between it and cancer are absolutely inherent.

On any given day of the week, I can walk around my university campus and spot at least 17 pairs of UGG boots. Either it's been snowing in the Bay Area or it was unanimously decided that the hideous footwear would be symbolic. Are the pink pairs for breast cancer? There's black, tan, pink and I bet an impending, more artsy palette to come: terracotta, sage, taupe. When I see a pair I can't even say "Ugh" anymore because of the irony. I am left scraping the back of my subconscious for a term that's onomatopoetically indicative of the nausea I am feeling.

The female gender has pulled a fast one on itself. Typically, females cannot stand to wear the same thing as another female, especially a peer. Females also wear things based on the comfort it provides. This can only mean the boots are so incredibly comfortable that the fact that one in ten girls are wearing them goes unnoticed.

However, there is a solution to this chronic eye sore. Somehow, designers must convince gang members to wear them based on color affiliation. Within a week, pink UGGs will have the same law enforcement warning as a solid red hoodie. For once, I am actually endorsing gang involvement. They are people too, afterall. And to give them a chance to give back to the community they keep taking from, to have a hand in student "re-education" ? It's a self-healing wound. I know I wouldn't get shanked.